The Game Thickens, Sickens: Denmark, Cartoons, Iran and O-I-L

A version of this post originally appeared on the now defunct blog, Team Sakib.

It seems the entirety of the relevant Muslim world is flipping out over the cartoons printed months ago in a Danish newspaper demeaning the Prophet (pbuh).

This Wikipedia summary provides an approximate chronology. The thing blew up when the Danish government was asked to either censure the paper or issue an apology by several Muslim governments, and it refused. Now Danish embassies are being bombed and closed throughout the Middle East and in Pakistan and other Euros are at threat too.

Muslims have to realize, we can't expect enemies to deal with us civilly. The barbaric, uncivilized types that run conservative, xenophobic, European newspapers are the same types that run conservative, xenophobic, American media outlets. You will not get Michael Savage to apologize for hating on Islam, because Michael Savage hates Islam.

My friend, OS, brought this article to my attention today in the Guardian. In it, a European Muslim group accuse the Danish newspaper of having a "double standard" because it refused to publish a cartoon demeaning Prophet Isa (p) (Jesus in whitey's speak) three years earlier. The paper gave a straight reason why it refused to publish the Jesus cartoon:

I don't think Jyllands-Posten's readers will enjoy the drawings. As a matter of fact, I think that they will provoke an outcry. Therefore, I will not use them.

Furthermore, Jyllands-Posten stated that the Jesus cartoons were unsolicited and the Mohammed (pbuh) cartoons were drawn upon request by the paper. This provides a very simple explanation for why the cartoons were published. The newspaper's editors felt the Mohammed (pbuh) cartoons would be enjoyable to their readership and would not provoke their target readership to outcry. Given that the newspaper aims to sell to right-wing, Christian, xenophobic, Islamphobic Eurotrash, this seems like sound marketing logic.

The Muslim group's objections are meritless and frivolous. They are analogous to accusing the Ku Klux Klan of having a double standard for lynching black men and not white men.

SakibKh (12:29:27 PM): its like asking the klan to apologize for lynching black ppl
OS (12:29:31 PM): hahahaahahahahaah
SakibKh (12:29:33 PM): and not poor white ppl
OS (12:29:35 PM): yeah
OS (12:29:41 PM): or asking why ******************************
SakibKh (12:30:08 PM): its like "the klan rejected the proposal to lynch earl, a poor white man living in a trailor park three years earlier"
SakibKh (12:30:42 PM): the grand wizard said "lynching earl would have been offensive to many klan members. it would not have been enjoyable"
SakibKh (12:31:16 PM): "we solicited n*****s to lynch" the wizard added "that's the difference between the two cases. earl was completely unsolicited"
OS (12:32:40 PM): just put this on ure blog
SakibKh (12:32:44 PM): civil rights activist kanye titta asked, "how can the klan distinguish between the two cases? this smacks of a double standard"
SakibKh (12:32:51 PM): i might
OS (12:32:57 PM): yah
SakibKh (12:33:35 PM): i smell a masterpiece entry coming up
SakibKh (12:33:38 PM): titled:
SakibKh (12:33:47 PM): BREAKING NEWS: Europe is Racist, Anti-Muslim
OS (12:34:03 PM): no no
OS (12:34:17 PM): breaking news: Muslims: You're Being Racist
SakibKh (12:34:22 PM): ?
OS (12:34:24 PM): Europe: We don't give a f***
OS (12:34:28 PM): ps-we hate you and leave our countries

Anywho, for all of those people out there who want to be quick to condemn the Muslims burning and rioting at the Danish and Austrian Embassies across the world, I say screw condemnation. The only use condemnation will have is to "show them that we are not like that". They think that our beloved Prophet (pbuh) was a psycho with a bomb in his turban, bent on killing and maiming. Astughfurullah!

Do I have any concern with the protection of Danish property? No, Mr. Salafi, I don't. Mr. Salafi has been very upset about the uproar and the incursion upon property rights by Muslims in this whole affair. According to him, property rights are sacred in Islam and should not be violated and that Muslims should not concern themselves with the doings of the Kaafir (infidels in whitey's speak). Mr. Salafi, I say to hell with the brush strokes, I will focus on the entirety of this Monet. The Danes want to provoke a fight? (And by the government's crass reaction, it is possible they do) Then let them have the hell that they've created. It certainly won't take me 3 excuses to forgive my brothers in Beirut and Cairo and Islamabad, much less 70.

Of course, Iran has an appropriate response. An Iranian newspaper is holding a contest on "Holocaust Cartoons" to test the West's tolerance for free speech. Obviously, clever, well planned, and also offensive. Iran is proving itself as a land of civil libertarians. Someday, I need to make a list of Iran's greatest hits. This would rank up there, along with their response after 9/11, when the Iranian government condemned all terrorism, especially the Zionist plots to bring down the World Trade Center. Iran pledged to help the US in any way possible to strike back at Israel for 9/11. CLASSIC.

But the end game of this all is possibly expressed by a incredulous Russian politician. This dude is theorizing that:

1. The US is attacking Iran on the day of the Israeli elections, March 28th.
2. The cartoons explosion (caused by the very very very late non-apology by the Danish PM) is part of an American plot to create a division between Europe and the Islamic world and make Europe more inclined towards war.
3. Russia should remain relatively indifferent, but show marginal support for the Muslims against the US/KKK/EU alliance.
   

Wow. It certainly is true that the US is benefiting from all this unrest in Europe. The Americans can make the Euros look at Muslims as a short-term nuisance that can be exterminated, and make them forget about OIL DEPENDENCE and US/EU competition. Classic diversionary advantage. I'm not saying there's a conspiracy, but I am saying that Dubya/Cheney/Zionists/Exxon-Mobile is the benefactor.

Comments?

Desi Futures Gone Up in Smoke?

This post originally appeared on the now defunct blog, Team Sakib.

It seems like whenever I someone asks me if I smoke hookah, my response is an instant conversation killer. So I don't smoke hookah, I've never tried it and I really feel no impulse to do so. Why is that so alienating to most 19-22 year old Desi kids?

Look, I lived in a virtual smoker's den. I spent a full year chillin in clouds of second hand, riding the sheesha hangouts as a "hangout killing hanger-on". I've seen enough bowls be packed to replicate it so its not harsh (I think so at least), and I know that 1 and 1/2 coals is the ideal placement for most large hookahs. I've seen the effects of ice chambers and I know the tongue motion to produce rings (but not hearts).

But the whole culture is still not appealing. It's too much of a social crutch. It's too easy to fall into the trap, where time flies by and your conscious is lost. It's like thefacebook.com, just with tobacco.

Do I feel that those who smoke are bad people? Not in the least. Smoking hookah is the least thing someone can do and its debatable as to whether its haraam/mukhrooh/etc. Those who smoke surely don't think they're engaging in haraam, and thus you really can't blame them for much.

But then why does my personal choice not to smoke lead to the inevitable "oh"? Is it guilt in people? Do people think I'm an uptight prude? Or is it that I might kill a potential hangout by not being down w/ an outting to the hookah bar? "Better not call Sakib, then we can't go to Casbah". Hmmm... Mad curious on this one.

People don't like leaving comments on the blog, but if you're feeling courageous, chime in on this question:

Do you think my choice not to smoke is adversely affecting my social life?